ok, its 3.34am and my shift tomorrow will be at 10am. ngantox gaban tapi x leh tido.
WHY? coz i cant stop thinking.
i think i need to meditate la, zikir2 ke sket bifo tido everyday so i cud get optimum punye sleeping benefit iaitu x ngantox mase alarm clock bunyi telolong every morning.
i think about when will gaji going to masuk, will they deduct my gaji due to my ELs, will it be on 22nd or 23rd or 24th or 25th (x mungkin la sbb da kismes..apa da hang ni cikin!)
i think about what to wear tomorrow since its monday...sbenanye da ade plan nak pakai ape tp mmg bukan monday suit la cite die..n kompem berseliper nike itam pojaan atiku : )
i think about beras 20kg yg aku janji nak sponser utk kenduri ahad ni..tah bile mase aku nak g beli. beras ape tau dah..tp bile nak beli..bile?
i think about mr yoga bodo yg x dpt iphone die kat plaza sing..esok die cari lagi ke x? nak dispute lg ke x?
i think about nescafe 3 in 1 yg da abeh..kat pantry kopi x sedap. milo buat sleepy.how?
i think about phone yg ilap offer tadi..bebaloi ke x amek vivaz 2 months old, rm700..tapi ikot ati nak storm, ikot napsu nak torch, ikot maybank pakai je e63.hahahaha!
i think about me..about my life..about who i am now and compare it to whom i planned to be or who i was once back then. am i approaching the better lane or the worst lane? is comparing those is healthy for me?
i think im bored..i think im lost..i think im depressed due to so many reasons..
i think this is a trial..i think this is temperoray..i think he just wanted to see how far can i go..
i think about all those things that inspired me but no action was taken..i just continue thinking.
once read this :
“Dan tidak ada seorang pun akan beriman kecuali dengan izin Allah; dan Allah menimpakan kemurkaan kepada orang-orang yang tidak mempergunakan akalnya”. (Q.S.Yunus [10]: 100).
tapi konteks 'gune akal utk berfikir' dlm kes aku ni cam da over sket coz x menambahkan ilmu, menambahkan penyakit ade la.kang mule la kepale sakit, belakang sakit, sinus pon singgah sahur sampai buke x balik2..
i think (tgk!!) i should sleep. then ill stop all the thinking atleast for the next few hours. kann..
